The world's traveller

I didn't travel the world to find happiness, I've already had it in my pocket.

I went around to get challenged. Took every believe I had and placed it on the brightest spot. Got 'experts' to question them, rip them apart and arm new ones... It was scary, I have to admit.

I traveled the world to share my happiness. Found people that had their own, exchanged pieces and got mine to diversify. This was the most rewarding part!

I said when we started the conversation about my willing to travel.

She paused a second or two, to drop another question - and what was the outcome?

I love the fact that she manages to challenge me regularly. It feels as if I reinvent myself everyday.

The outcome? - I ask myself in loud voice - and then replied:

I managed to see my believes unfold like a blossoming flower, opening each petal to reveal yet another level.

Collected concepts of happiness, that I would have never managed to create myself. What amazing stories I heard and experienced.

Understood that there is always something that will challenge me - that's what life is all about - but every time I have an option: hide or stay. None of them is better than the other. Each will eventually unfold a gift for me if I remain present.

Happiness is a misunderstood concept, that I'm still unable to explain. It tends to happen when you experience something with your whole self and is extremely difficult to grasp.

That every road we take will lead to another extraordinary experience, We just need to remember:
Difficult is extraordinary
Challenging is extraordinary
Sad is extraordinary
Boring is a misunderstanding of extraordinary.

...Easy to say, quite difficult to remember...

Use a post it! - I said between my laughter.

She laughed with me, there was nothing serious about what I'd said. It was just us listening to the words my brain put together.


V.

Letting it go

We go through life learning many things
Some of them are taught in school,
Others on life's path.
For the tougher ones, we get no preparation. They arrive, without us anticipating it and let us struggle.

One of those is the art of letting go...
Saying goodbye isn't an easy thing, there is a bonding that will break and a nostalgy that will instantly form.

Memories that will follow us like ghostly images from the past. Images that imprinted themselves and recall moments that are dearest to us.

Nostalgy will find a place on our hearts, it will play sad tones and sing about the wonderful moments that are no more.

An instant, that intense moment when the final goodbye comes. That is the hardest part, the one we fear the most.

It is all this that prevent us from embracing change, because we know we will have to let go: people, place, objects.

Ultimately, this is why make us uncomfortable about death. Not being able to escape that form of letting go, is indeed a powerless sensation.



Let it go...
Sounds easier
Gets harder


V.

Ownership's sense

When my life belongs to me
I experience a sense of ownership that goes beyond words.

I'm the captain of my life!
I can sail in the direction I fancy,
Explore areas that were unknown before.

I'm the audience and leading actress.
I'm the peasant and the queen.
I'm everything and nothing at all.

It is the feeling that keeps me going:
My heart bouncing with inexplicable joy, and my soul experiencing a sense of fulfilment that words can't capture.


I'm the owner!



But don't take me wrong, life not always goes the way I want.
Sometimes it gets trapped in severe storm and others in windless days.

There are days when I lose all hopes... Everything seems out of place, like being stubbornly held by some mysterious hand.

It is then, when I get the chance to steer the wheel, plan again if needed...At times my only option is to stand still and wait for good winds to blow.

Even then I feel a deep sense of satisfaction, excitement and courage - I know I have the power to change the course into another adventure



V.

Challenge

There is a me
There is an us
There is a time and a space
There is a challenge.

The challenge of embracing the waves that will hit my shore.

How do I stand when the wind blows?- was the her question

I don't stand... I shake! - was my initial thought - I shake like the leaf in the wind...

How else could I answer such question?
if I'm constantly faced against my own true, if every step I make needs to be my decision. Doubts know my address and knock on my door regularly.

I shake... I tremble from the core.

With time, I have realized that this shake will produce the following changes:
1.Some things won't fit me as before - I'll have to leave them behind

2. New things will arrive - I'll need to invest time understanding them

3. My reference's points will fade away - I'll have to calmly tolerate incertitude

4. My truth will expand as it weakens - I'll need to remember this.


I don't stand. I Shake. I become a new me that goes through a funnel and change on the way.

I'm like the tree at wind's mercy: It shakes with the wind. If storms come, it will bend. The tree knows it will renew. I instead fear my core will disappear. What a fool!

My answer:
Shaking, while holding to my root. Failing and winning, but undoubtedly growing and trying one more time... That's how I stand.

V.